Friends Forever?
by BlueSphinx
Summary: A few scenes from the Marauders' time at Hogwarts. Their first night at Hogwarts, finding out that Remus is a werewolf, becoming animagi, and the infamous prank!
1. The End and the Beginning

Chapter 1: The End and the Beginning

Sirius rested his chin on his knees and blinked his eyes which were sore from unshed tears and sleepless night. Now it was morning already. From where he was crouched on the ground he could see the sun gilding the highest towers of Hogwarts castle while the rest of the school was still hidden in dark nightly shadows. An early ray of light had found its way through the boughs of the crooked trees, as well, and gently stroked his pale cheeks and shiny hair, but he quickly moved away from its caress, back to the shadows of the cave, back to where he belonged.

Last day and a half seemed like a blur to him. The silliest prank of his life. James shouting, Peter paling with horror. And the moon; the full moon so bright in the sky he didn't know where to hide his eyes. He had spilled his heart and then run. He had come to this cave here up in the mountains and he had sunk on the ground, afraid to think of what he had done, too frightened to want to know what had happened. He had sat there in the darkness all night, and then all day, and then another night.

He would never go back to school now.

The small patch of light on the ground had shifted closer to Sirius as the sun rose higher, but before he could get up to move further into the darkness, a figure appeared in the mouth of the small cave he was hiding himself in, and blocked the light.

"You should come back," Peter said, but instead of helping him up he sank down on the ground next to Sirius. The ray of light, now released again, glittered on the first tear Sirius had shed all that time.

"I'm an awful person," he muttered, not even drying his face. He stared in front of himself, not daring to move, afraid that maybe then the thoughts would come.

"Everyone's alive," Peter said with strained happiness in his voice, watching Sirius as he buried his face in his hands and sighed heavily.

"I'm expelled, aren't I?" he said into his hands.

"Not yet," another voice answered from the mouth of the cave. Sirius raised his eyes and saw James and Remus entering. Remus looked tired and sad, just as Peter did, but James' eyes were full of anger and disappointment. With heavy sighs they both sunk down on the ground, as well, their backs leaning against the walls of the cave, their eyes staring blankly at the emptyness in the centre of the small room.

The silence was hard on Sirius' ears. He felt he needed to say something, yet nothing would be good enough, he knew. He had betrayed his best friends to their fiercest enemy. _And greasiest_, he heard his mental voice add, but shrugged it off, afraid that he would break into an involuntary smile. Instead he forced his mind back to the graveness of his deed, reminding himself the day it all began.

-----

The tower room was definitely too small for his taste. The eight four-poster beds were crammed together only barely leaving any room for their suitcases, and making any quicker moving in the dormitory almost impossible. The air smelled a bit stale and it was altogether chilly in there, though the red and gold used in decoration improved the overall image of the room slightly. And he was hoping with all his might that his new classmates would be different from what his family was like.

He quickly jumped into the bed which was closest to the chimney and therefore the warmest.

"Hey, that's my bed!" a small boy with messy hair interrupted him mid-jump.

"No," he replied, landing on the bed with a stomp that made the floor under it creak. "My suitcase is here just next to it." And true to his word, the case with silver engraving of _Sirius Black_ was on the floor on the other side of the bed.

"But so is mine," the other boy argued, pointing half-accusingly, half-amusedly between the beds. A plaque bearing the name of James Potter was attached to the top of a large suitcase which indeed stood next to the one belonging to Sirius.

"But I was here first!"

"But my suitcase was here first!" came the swift answer.

"Prove it!" Sirius shot back. He could see the proving wouldn't be too hard, for the other suitcase was pressed between the wall and his suitcase, but that didn't matter at the moment. What mattered was that he was feeling cold and sleepy and convinced in having a better claim on the bed.

By the time that James had finished proving his point they had gathered the attention of the rest of the boys in the dormitory. Most of them were watching the ongoing argument intently from their warm and comfortable beds, but a relatively short and swift boy was standing just next to them, his head shooting from one side to the other as he tried to keep up with their words.

"And the red on your suitcase goes just as well with the crimson curtains of the other bed; the curtains are the same colour, so that's not a point!" Sirius screamed, letting the flow of the argument draw him with it.

"But your hair is too dark for the pillowcase there!"

"Your hair is a shade darker than mine!"

"That way it suits better!"

"SHUT UP!"

The stubby boy between them seemed to have finally cracked. He looked a bit stunned at himself shouting so loudly and, fidgeting with the hem of his robes, added, "Some of us are trying to sleep here."

Sirius sent a fleeting glance towards James who currently let his gaze waver over the five heads plopping out from between the closed curtains of their five beds.

"So… erm…What's your name?" James asked, turning back to the small boy.

"Peter," he answered shyly.

"Well, Peter, you see, the thing is me and…" he looked questioningly towards Sirius.

"Sirius," he answered politely to the shrug James had sent his way.

"See, me and Sirius were just trying to go to sleep, too," James explained in an overly sweet and motherly voice which Sirius actually found quite amusing.

"So, Peter," Sirius added from his side, not wanting to let James get the better of him, "would you like to have this bed?" He indicated to the one they were arguing over.

"Hey, you can't offer him something that's not yours to offer!" James interjected.

"No," Peter replied quickly, frightened enough by James' words to draw back from the fight. "I have my own over by the window…" And he retreated.

"You're smart not to take it," one of the boys who were watching from the beds said wearily.

"Yeah," James laughed victoriously, "because it's mine!" And with that he jumped right past Sirius onto the same bed.

"Hey you…" Sirius started, grabbing the pillow and getting ready for a fight, but he was stopped.

The boy who had just approved of Peter's retreat had clambered out of his bed and was standing there in his pyjamas, twirling his wand between his fingers. He looked pale and underfed, somehow sickly, but intimidating nonetheless.

"I know some really good spells actually," he said with a chuckle hidden behind his sombre tone. "And I hope you'll find a nice calm solution to your small problem here." He eyed warily the pillow that Sirius was clutching.

"I know what we'll do," James said, shooting his fist in the air in triumph, only narrowly missing Sirius' nose.

"Start a fight?" Sirius asked.

"No, we'll switch beds now and then."

"What? Like wake up every two hours to move into the other bed? You're mad!"

"No, but let's say I have Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday, and then you'll get to sleep in my bed on Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday," James concluded, trying to wrench the pillow out of Sirius' hands.

"So you have my bed to yourself every Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday, and I only get to sleep here on Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday?" Sirius asked, not loosening his grip on the pillow.

"No, my bed," James said.

"Mine," Sirius argued.

"And I'm not afraid to use those spells!" the other boy shouted.

Sirius let his gaze wonder from the wand to his suitcase to James' suitcase to the bed to James, and then nodded at the same moment that James did.

"So, three days for one of you and three days for the other," Peter said from the far end of the room as the three remaining first-years climbed finally to their beds. "But what about Saturdays?"

Sirius looked towards James for a moment, but then pulled the blanket up to his chin. "Who wants to sleep on Saturdays anyway," he said sleepily as his toes found the warm-water bottles that no doubt some house elf had put there. He realized that maybe that bed wasn't too bad after all, and that maybe going to Hogwarts would be a nice experience.

"Hey you, pale boy," James from the warmest bed said. "What's your name?"

"Remus," came a sleepy answer from one of the curtained-off beds.

"Do you want to have this bed?" James asked with a barely-concealed snort of laughter. "You could have the Saturdays, Sirius and I won't need the bed then…"

"Hey, don't you give out my bed so lightly!" Sirius reprimanded slowly through the first scenes of dreams already.

"My bed," James corrected and a silent snoring took him over, as well.


	2. Traitor

Chapter 2: Traitor

James was really uncomfortable sitting on the cold hard floor of the cave. His back was sore from the difficult climb to the cave; besides, he had not wanted to come at all. And the emptiness of the room and the silence everyone was engulfing him in made the whirlwind of thoughts in his head almost suffocating. Thousands of different _what if_-s rushed through his mind. The torn-up body of Snape, his own torn-up body, Remus expelled, Remus in Azkaban, Sirius in Azkaban, Sirius dead, Remus dead…And, besides, his legs were still prickling from where they had been hurt two nights ago. And everyone who said that Snape was skinny and therefore not heavy should better not say it in front of him.

James snorted loudly with agitation, and two pairs of inquiring eyes shot towards him.

"I'm going back down," he said, trying not to notice the silent pleading in Remus' look and the disappointment in Peter's.

"No you're not," Peter said defiantly.

"But it seems that you've got nothing to say," James accused the whole room in general, though everyone knew who it was meant for. Yet, he kept his place and slumped back down into the corner, and closed his eyes when he noticed Sirius move. He didn't want to meet Sirius' sad and hollow look. He was definitely not going to forgive him so easily for what he had done.

It wasn't just a prank gone wrong, whatever the others told him. They had had a few of those in their past history at Hogwarts, yet none of them had included such treachery, such betraying of secrets, such unbelievable gambling with others' lives. He knew he couldn't ever manage to pull up enough hate to send somebody to their death, and he had always believed that his friends were like him in that respect. But now, just out of nowhere, without any reason at all, Sirius had gone off and done something like that.

It wasn't all Sirius' fault, he had to admit. James rested his chin on his knees and heaved a heavy sigh that made Remus by his side shiver a little.

Of course he couldn't blame it all on Sirius. Wasn't Sirius out to avenge him? Didn't he do it just because Snape had led the group of Slytherins who had tied him up before that Quidditch game? And didn't he actually ask Sirius to help him get back on Snape?

Yes, he was the one to blame. It was all his doing. He should be the one everyone was angry with at the moment. A small voice in his head reminded him that he was the only angry one there, but he drowned it into the ever-swirling flood of horrors in his brain, and sighed again.

"Promise me you'll still remember my birthdays!" he shouted suddenly, and started to shake Remus' shoulder forcefully. "Promise me!"

Only when Remus jumped away from him did he look up and, seeing the puzzled faces of the others, realise what he was doing. The desperation in his eyes extinguished a bit as he hunched into the corner again.

"I think I…" he muttered through his hands, "I think I lost it for a moment…" He swallowed heavily and tried to breathe levelly, forcing away the panic that had started in him when he realised he had almost become a murderer. Remus' startled face next to him begun to calm down, as well, but in James' mind it turned fiercer, became that of the werewolf. He again tried to flood it away, thinking instead of the day they found out the Secret.

-----

"Now what?" James asked his friends as he threw himself into his favourite armchair. They had just been caught out of their common-room after the curfew.

"Now we prank the Gryffindors," came the obvious answer from Sirius who, losing no time, flung himself on top of James. "Hey, that's my armchair!"

"No, it's mine," James answered, his voice muffled by the hair of his best friend.

"What about some homework then?" Peter asked timidly, glancing towards Remus for support.

"We've done everything already," James answered, doing his best to push Sirius off him. "Get off, I can't breathe!"

"We have to read chapter 27 in DADA…" Peter insisted again.

"When have we ever needed to read the chapters in advance," Remus laughed suddenly, making all the three people look at him in amazement. Sirius even fell down from the armchair, but that could have been due to the fact that James threw him out.

His view of Remus clean of any of Sirius' hair, James looked at him in wonder. That was definitely the first time ever he had heard the teachers' pet say that they didn't need to do their homework. And probably, his mind assured him, it would be the last time as well. Therefore, coming to the logical assumption, he grabbed the chance.

"You're right, Remus," he said, drawing the attention of his three friends to himself. "Better let's go and explore the castle, again. I mean, we have to work out the password to open that secret passage behind that ugly statue of the witch…"

"I'd rather we stayed inside," Remus quickly stopped him.

"But you just said…" Sirius whined theatrically, when suddenly the Portrait Hole opened and a very strict-looking McGonagall climbed in with a lot of difficulty.

"Ah, Remus, you're awake," he greeted the whole group with a small nod. "Remus, please follow me. It's your mother, she's sick…" The Head of House looked apologetically at Peter, James, and Sirius, and escorted an uncomfortable-looking Remus out of the Common Room.

"Again?" James asked in amazement as the portrait hole swung closed.

"Yeah, I think we should send her some flowers!" Peter advised.

"I think we should send Remus some flowers," Sirius added, dropping down into the armchair that James had left just moments ago. "Anyway, it's no use going out to study the passage without Remus."

"Let's go and get one over the Gryffindor prefects, then," James suggested.

"Or let's go and get our books and read chapter 27…" Peter interjected.

"You're turning into Remus, you know?" Sirius asked from where he was stretched out in the armchair.

"And you're turning into a pancake!" James shouted merrily to Sirius, before jumping down on top of him to get back for what he had done earlier.

"Ouch, you shouldn't eat so many pancakes, James," Sirius told him, clutching his ribcage on which James had landed.

"It's not my fault they make them so good here at Hogwarts!"

"It's not their fault that you're gluttonous!"

"Hey, that's a Remus-word to use!" James argued back.

"I can use whatever words I please!" Sirius answered.

Somewhere in the course of the argument, they didn't even notice when exactly, Peter had left the Common Room, brought his book, come back, and started reading chapter 27.

"It wasn't I who hit your head against that table!" Sirius was claiming.

"Really, what were your hands doing then pressing both of my ears and forcing me to lean forward?"

"But that bump looks great on you! Especially with the moon shining on it!"

"It was you who charmed the curtains of my bed open so that I couldn't sleep all night with the moon shining in my face?" James almost screeched.

"And what if it was? I had your best interests in my mind! I was thinking that maybe one of those pretty girls would come sleepwalking to our room and if the curtains were closed they wouldn't see how charming you are when you're asleep!"

"I wasn't asleep!"

"But I could charm you asleep, too," Sirius suggested quickly, bursting into a laugh and jumping off the chair.

"Anyway, it's a good idea! Let's do it to the prefects!" James laughed as well, following Sirius down to the floor. "It's full moon, so they'll be up all night!"

"Remus!" Peter said suddenly

James looked quickly down to the portrait hole, but there was no one there. "You're going crazy? He went to see his mum, he'll be gone all night," he told Peter, a bit of disappointment in his voice.

"No… I mean… When did he go last time? A month ago, wasn't it?" Peter asked them, looking up from his book.

"So what? There are some ailments that strike repeatedly, my mum told me about some and, you know, she's a Healer," James said.

"But… Look at this!" Peter exclaimed, pointing out of the window to the moon that shone brightly over the tops of the Forbidden Forest.

"Yeah, the moon…" Sirius stretched. "We should go and charm the prefects' curtains open…"

"No!" Peter was looking from one of them to the other in amazement. "And they say that you're the smart ones!"

"Erm… Sirius, did you hear what I just heard?" James asked in amusement.

"Yeah, I think so," Sirius answered, and as if on a cue they turned to Peter again.

"Did you just call us stupid?"

"I suggest you do your homework!" Peter said, throwing his book at them. "Chapter 27, _The Werewolves_," he told them and sunk back in his chair to look at their reactions.

James gave the small textbook he was holding in his arms a questioning look. Then he turned to Sirius who was staring out of the window as if some girl had slapped him in his face unexpectedly. Sirius' mouth was open and his cheeks were burning red; James was sure he didn't look as flabbergasted as his friend. When he turned to Peter, though, his face was greeted with a small chuckle.

"So, what do we do now?" Peter asked, turning from James to Sirius and back again.

"I don't know…" James said slowly. "And don't you dare say that we're supposed to be the smart ones…"

Sirius was still watching the Forbidden Forest with round eyes, the silvery moon shining down on his face. Finally he blinked his eyes and closed his mouth, only to open it again and comment, "So the werewolves really do exist…"

----------

**A/N:** If you didn't like it the only way I can improve it is if you tell me what's wrong with it!


	3. The Bonds of Friendship

Chapter 3: The Bonds of Friendship

Remus concentrated on listening to the swallow that was singing outside. He wished somebody would say something, something more understandable than what James had just screamed. He couldn't believe his ears when James had said that; it sounded as if James had decided not to be friends with him any more.

But Remus realised that there was nothing to be surprised at, actually. What had happened there two nights ago had made them all see how dangerous a beast he really was. What amazed him, though, was that James had been the first to lose his self-control; had it been Sirius to start shouting and using violence like that he wouldn't have been as surprised, and the same went for Peter. The first of them had always been somehow too much an individual to really blend into them, too strong a personality, too different in the beliefs that had been forced into him as a child; it didn't matter that he fought against them with all his might, he still remembered them, he had a different perspective on life than the others. And Peter, with heart and soul he belonged to their periods of study, and adventures of mischief-making, but somehow Remus could never imagine him being sullen and devastated; misery didn't suit Peter.

As for James, Remus had always admired the way he managed to smooth out all their differences, end their arguments so that they felt growing even closer after those than they had been before. He knew their little group would have never been formed if it wasn't for the incessant friendliness and humour radiating from James. It had most changed Sirius, everyone could see, by bringing him out from behind the wall of moroseness that he had built around him, but neither Remus himself nor Peter were left unaffected by James' flamboyant manners.

And now James had been the one to quit.

Remus laughed bitterly, the sarcasm in the sound echoing in the otherwise silent cave. He didn't want them to leave him, yet he knew it was the right thing to do. They could never roam the castle and the forest again as close friends, and he knew that there was only him to blame, or really the beast that he was. Of course, when he had been younger he had believed that it was fate who had made him what he was, but only a couple of classes on Divination and that belief was flung into the flames. He had blamed the one who bit him, but as time went by he had learned how difficult it was to control his actions at full moon, and so now he only pitied that creature. And he had blamed his parents, but their immense care for him made all negative feelings towards them impossible.

No, Remus knew that he was the only one to whom the blame went.

The swallow outside was still singing so merrily that Remus felt he couldn't tolerate it any longer.

"Say something," he whispered, eyeing his three friends in desperation.

But nobody said anything. Peter just raised his eyes for a moment, blinked at him, and then looked back down to the patch of sunlight on the floor. Sirius didn't even look; his forehead was leaning on his knees as he sat in the corner furthest away from the others. James, on the other hand, did stretch out his neck. He studied Sirius for a moment, then moved over to Peter, and only then met the gaze of Remus.

And in his eyes Remus saw hate, saw anger, saw fury, and he felt as if a dagger had been stabbed through his heart.

"How can you… I thought…" he stammered quietly, biting back a sob. He felt a tear escape his eye before he broke the eye contact.

He felt that James hated him. Hated him because he was a threat to James and his friends; hated him because he, Remus, a part of their merry group, had almost become a murderer. It didn't matter that it had been involuntary, it didn't matter that he couldn't control himself; those things only made it worse. Remus dried the tear that was making its way down his cheek; he didn't want them to see that he had broken down. He mentally searched his brain, trying to find the right words to make them understand how he regretted having claimed a part in their lives. But instead of the right vocabulary he chanced upon a scene from the past, which he previously had thought to be the happiest moment of his life.

-----

Remus let his weary head sink into the soft pillow. He was lying in his usual bed in the Hospital Wing, and thanked whomever there was to thank for the fact that it was a Saturday morning, and he didn't have to go to class. The young school nurse, Madam Pomfrey, was her own fussy self, tucking him in, shading the windows near his bed, running around with vials of different colourful potions. It was a usual Hospital Wing morning for Remus.

But just as Pomfrey was bringing him the long-awaited goblet of Strengthening Solution, someone knocked on the door.

Thrusting the goblet in Remus' hands, the matron ran to open up. Expecting it to be professor McGonagall, Remus relaxed and sipped his potion. He almost choked when he heard Pomfrey.

"Black, Potter, Pettigrew! Did you notice what spell they used this time?" she exclaimed, and Remus did his best to hide under his blanket.

"No, we're here to visit Remus," said the confident voice of James, and Remus wisely gave up all pretensions of not being there.

"Oh, then come in. Over the—" she said, but then caught herself in the middle of the word and, shaking her head fiercely, started again, "Sorry, he's away visiting his mother."

"Yes, and that there is a Slytherin cursed to look like Remus," said Sirius, pointing towards the bed where Remus was lying.

"I'll store that idea in my organized brain for later reference," James said, looking up at Sirius.

"Erm… your organized brain? Peter, make sure you remember the idea," Sirius commented, and Peter chuckled.

"So, my dear lady, may we, please, advance?" James asked Pomfrey with a small bow, taking her hand and kissing it.

Pomfrey blushed fiercely, turned around, and disappeared in her rooms.

"She's down," James said, nodding, his face severe.

"I just can't believe you really managed to win her over from me," Sirius replied, shaking his head in mock disbelief. "So how much time do you give me to win her back?"

"Counteraction or no counteraction?" James asked.

"Let's make it counteraction this time," Sirius said with bravado.

"Do it in two weeks and I'll get mum to bake you some of those strawberry muffins!"

"Two weeks? No problem!" Sirius whistled, glancing towards the now closed door at the far end of the Hospital Wing.

"You should at least try to respect the school staff," Remus scolded his friends as they strode to him and sat on the beds next to his.

"Poor guy, he's cursed to think like Remus, too," Sirius despaired, looking at James in big round eyes.

"Good idea, I'll store this one too. We really should do this to some of the Slytherins…" James agreed.

"So, Remus, do you have something to tell us?" Peter asked quickly, in advance suffocating what was about to become another bickering session between James and Sirius. And he succeeded; the two shut up immediately, looking at Remus with eyes full of anxiety.

Remus knew that they knew. This was as far as their friendship would go. They would never find out what was there behind the statue of the ugly witch. This was it.

"Well… yeah… You see… well… I'm a werewolf," he said finally, lowering his eyes.

"Awesome!" Sirius whispered in awe.

"Perfect," added James, also in whisper.

"So, what's it like?" Peter asked a bit hesitatively.

Remus raised his gaze to see six eyes pouring into him, a sparkle of adventure in each of them. Maybe he wasn't going to be left alone after all.

"You don't want to know," he admitted silently, a little taken aback by the anxiety in his friends. He sipped his potion again in the tense silence that followed. He couldn't even understand what it was that he was feeling; horror at the fact that his friends were not frightened of him, relief that they were not going to abandon him, or maybe even gratefulness that the enormous burden of keeping such a big secret from his best friends was taken away from him with just those short words. He twirled the goblet in his hands, wondering if he should say something.

"I'll tell you what I've read," James quickly supplied, noticing his discomfort. "I once read," he started in a secretive whisper, forcing the other three to bow towards him to hear at least something. "I read from a heavy book, a Muggle book with real-life illustrations and everything. I read…" he cut off again, his voice growing lower and lower every second, bowing down on Remus' bed so that his chin was almost touching the blanket in the end. "I read that…"

"What did you read?" Sirius asked hoarsely, the suspense obviously too much for him.

James sent a quick look over his shoulder towards Pomfrey's room, his voice now barely louder than a breath. "I read that the moon is actually made of cheese!" he whispered victoriously.

Remus watched him in amazement, his mouth open and his goblet of potion forgotten. James was now laughing, trying to keep his voice still a bit lower than a fog-horn. The faces of Sirius and Peter, both still crouched down low to hear James' whisper, looked as if all motion in their brains had stopped.

Peter seemed to come to his senses the fastest. In a moment he was laughing almost as wildly as James. When Remus realised that he was still staring into the emptiness in front of him, he shook himself out of his stupor and joined in. In a matter of seconds Sirius had bent down double in laughter, too.

"And to think that…" he said between hiccups, "to think that just last night I was surprised that werewolves really exist!"

-----

**A/N:** Thank you for reading! Please leave a review, too, before you leave!


	4. Catalyst

**Disclaimer:** Not mine. At least not all mine. Some things are, like the flour, for example.

* * *

**Chapter 4: Catalyst**

Peter tapped on the ground with his fingers. He'd have given the world to know what the others were thinking. And he would have been quite happy if he could have understood his own thoughts, too. Everything looked so wrong — Sirius crying, James shouting with anger, Remus laughing mirthfully. He felt it was his job to turn it back to normal, to make them see they were still the people they had been before.

But he didn't know how to do it. He only knew they had to stick together. He couldn't let any of them leave.

Mix the ingredients together, and let them boil; in due time either the fumes will clear or it will explode, professor Slughorn would say. And then, afterwards, things will have sorted themselves out one way or another.

Just sit back, and watch, and let things happen.

"How can you… I thought…" he heard Remus mutter to James in desperation, and he turned away to hide the tear that had dropped from his eye at that.

Peter shrugged. Was he a bad friend to the others? He didn't feel as miserable as the other three looked, he was certain of that. He had only been in the role of a spectator that night. Sirius had run into him, screeching for James — Peter knew he was always the third one in the group when Remus was missing. Then Sirius had told his story, and they had both run off. And he, Peter, had decided to follow Sirius, not James.

He only found out later how close it had been. How the werewolf-Remus (he always kept good watch on himself, even in his thoughts, not to confuse it with the real Remus) had charged at James before he managed to transform, how Snape the Wimp had passed out just hearing its growling, how James had carried the limp Wimp away from the Shrieking Shack and had almost been battered to death by the Whomping Willow…he heard it all only in the next morning.

That night he had gone after Sirius. It wasn't easy to keep up with him, a desperate young man in a good health running with all his might. But being desperate meant that he never thought of transforming, so it was quite possible for Peter to follow him in his Animagus form. He had followed Sirius to this cave here, and watched his friend stomp down into a corner with an expressionless face, staring blankly into the darkness in front of him, no muscles moving in his face.

Peter had watched over him the entire night from the mouth of the cave, not once being noticed by Sirius. And then he had returned, to find out how the others were.

And now he was back up here. This time he brought the others, too. This time, he hoped, they were going to leave the cave together. Because they belonged together in everything they did, in everything they wanted, in everything they were. Because he knew that being miserable wouldn't led them anywhere.

_Mix the ingredients together, and let them boil; in due time either the fumes will clear or it will explode_. Yet, though Peter wasn't good in any specific subjects, he knew that a catalyst could at least quicken the process, and maybe even shift it in a preferable direction.

He sorted through his brain to find something to say, something that would remind the others of the times they've been there for each other, something that would kill the insufferable silence around them, the coldness that was emanating from the glances they shot at each other.

"I think I feel faint tickling in my fingers… I hope I'm not an ant," he finally said with a smile, and the memory claimed all his attention.

-----

"I'm not quite sure about it," Remus said, kneeling next to the cauldron and peering into it. "It looks kind of disgusting."

The liquid in there looked almost alive. It was swirling sea green in colour, and now and then little sequences of drops sprang out of there like snakes, only to sink back inside after reaching the height of about four inches.

"I don't think adding flour was a good idea, Sirius," James laughed from where he was comfortably sprawled out on the crimson pillows on the floor.

"It was you who said it needs to be thicker, and flour did the job pretty well. Besides, this is exactly what it has to look like, it's as if the picture in the _Moste Potente Potions_ has been copied straight from our mixture," Sirius said, leafing through a heavy and worn-looking book. "I can't understand, though, why it has to be green. Like there aren't any other colours left in the world."

Peter perched himself on a desk that had been shifted to the end of the room. "It doesn't look that bad at all. Remember the last patch?" he asked, flinging his legs.

Sirius made a disgusted face. "Yeah, I can't imagine Master Lupin here suggesting that adding powdered leaf of Muggle cauliflower would improve it in any way."

"Hey, don't jump at me!" Remus protested. "I mean, it does help with some other potions. Like Strengthening Solution, for example. It speeds up the boiling, and I thought it was worth a try!"

"It boiled up pretty quickly, that's true," Peter laughed, remembering the hours they had spent removing the sticky yellow foam from their faces, clothes, and hair, and the walls and ceiling of the room they used for making the potion. They had found this little room by coincidence when running away from Filch, because the door was disguised as a window overlooking the lake. He, Peter, in his usual hurry to do the best, had accidentally said _Acio-room_ instead of the intended _Accio broom_. And the window had opened to led them into this cosy classroom-like chamber.

"I think those wisps will wriggle when you try to swallow them," Remus said, eyeing the cauldron carefully.

"What are you worried about?" James asked. "You don't have to drink it."

Remus smiled a small victorious smile. "Neither do you," he told them.

"Aha! So that's what it's all about!" Sirius said, closing the book with a bang. "So that's why you let me add the flour! You hoped I'd ruin it!"

"Haven't we told you enough times already — we want to do it!" James said, shifting the pillows under his elbow to a more comfortable position.

"But I can't manage the spell!" Peter whined, jumping off the table, and squinting towards the others.

"I told you eighty four times already," Sirius said in a mockingly irritated voice, "you can do the spell alright, only you must not forget to stab yourself with your wand. You must tap your chest as close to the place where your heart is as possible."

"Yeah, and in your case, Sirius," James said, "as close to the place where it should be."

"You say I'm heartless? You want to see me being heartless? Here!" he conjured a goblet and quickly filled it with the swirling potion. "You drink first."

James sat up quickly and took the goblet, yet first throwing a pillow at Peter, just for the fun of it. "My hand's asleep!" he said, shaking it and trying to give the goblet back to Sirius.

"Oh no, you're going to drink it!" Sirius said, waving it back to him with an evil smile.

They were all now standing around the sitting James, staring down at him in anxiety.

"I'm sure it'll try to crawl back up your oesophagus," Remus supplied with an encouraging smile.

"What's the oesoe-whatever?" Peter asked quickly, still transfixed by the dancing droplets of the potion in the goblet.

"Quit it, Remus," James said, still shaking his hand, and looking at the potion in an uncertain way. He quickly sent a glance at his friends around him, then said, "Here goes nothing!" and with one gulp, emptied the goblet.

A moment later Peter jumped away when the now empty goblet flew right past his ear to the far corner of the room. He watched in horror how a strange white powdery substance covered James from head to foot, and a green fume was emanating from his eyes and ears.

"My wand, my wand!" he croaked, fumbling with it, so that it rolled away towards the cauldron.

Peter jumped after it, threw it quickly to Sirius, who in turn handed it to James. A high arc and, Peter knew it, a mental incantation later he pointed it to his heart.

The green smoke vanished. The white powder vanished. Where there had been sitting a teenage boy in school robes, there now was sitting a teenage boy in school robes. Peter, Remus, and Sirius looked at James expectantly, then disappointedly. Remus heaved a happy sigh.

"Nothing happened," Peter commentated. Sirius snorted.

"I think I feel faint tickling in my fingers… I hope I'm not an ant," James said, looking questioningly at his hand, and giggling slightly.

"I think you spent the whole night leaning on that arm, so it was asleep," Remus said, turning away from them to hide his smile.

"OK, maybe the flour wasn't a good idea," Sirius said, walking back to the cauldron and staring at the potion as if it had offended him. The potion in there was as merry as ever, looking just like it ought to look.

Peter joined Sirius at the cauldron. He could understand Remus' happiness on their failure; he could understand Sirius' frustration over three months worth of work going down the drain. What he couldn't understand was James' giddiness.

"So what now?" he asked, turning back to James, but instead finding a high majestic stag in his place. Peter squealed in delight.

-----

The three first year students walking past the window suddenly heard a high-pitched squeal of delight from somewhere near the lake, though there seemed to be no one outside. Then there was a splash, followed by an urgent shout.

"Why'd you push his head in there?"

And then,

"Quick, give him his wand!"

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**A/N:** I know I haven't updated for ages! But I have a good reason for it! I... OK, I have no good reason for it. Sorry. But there's only one more chapter to go after that, and then I can call this finished! I hope I'll have the last one up in less time than this one took...

One more thing... REVIEW!


	5. Friends Forever?

**Discalimer:** As you should already have understood, I don't own them.

**Note**: Last chapter up, finally. Read and enjoy!

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Chapter 5: Friends Forever

Peter smiled at the memory, and raised his eyes in time to see the other faces light up, too. As if one person the three previously morose teenagers looked up, shifted uncomfortably, and lowered their gaze, again. Maybe it hadn't been the best idea of a thing to say, after all.

"I'm sorry," all four said suddenly. Four gazes were raised from staring at the ground, and four pairs of eyes fell on four different faces.

"For what?" the four asked each other.

"For being a complete idiot," four voices answered from four different directions.

Remus couldn't help it. This sounded much more like the Marauders he knew them to be. He started chuckling. The other three followed him instantly, as if this had been some kind of a cue.

"I still think I should explain," Sirius said suddenly, disrupting their laughter.

"Me too," the others supplied in unison with three sighs.

"I'll go first," the four of them volunteered together. Sirius snorted.

"Let's go in some certain order," Remus suggested. "Alphabetical?"

"By first name or by family name?" Peter asked.

Two voices answered him simultaneously.

"First," James said.

"Reversed order of family names," Sirius demanded.

Silence fell as they thought over the options.

"Not much difference, is there?" Peter finally said.

"That's right," Remus caught on. "James, you go then."

"What do you want to know?" he asked.

"Anything," Sirius said. "Hey, that's not fair! I'm the last one again!" The three faces around him lit up in recognition, seeing the true Sirius again after the two days.

"So, can you imagine his face," James started with his usual vigour and excitement, paying no mind to Sirius' protests, "when he saw him or, then, it? He stood there unmoving for minutes, looking as if he had been turned into stone! As if all blood in his veins had been turned into ashes! And his left eyebrow was quivering in fright, and his cheeks were twitching as if he had inadvertently drowned his overly large nose into his socks, and a clamp of his hair had got stuck in the corner of his mouth!"

"It's unhealthy to eat that much grease," Peter piped in boldly, making Sirius double over in laughter. Even Remus was almost laughing openly.

"Last time I heard the story you said he stumbled to the floor and started babbling about his mummy," Remus commented.

"Well," Peter added, "when I heard it you just said he had dropped over, unconscious, as soon as he got there."

"I wasn't in a situation to pay much attention to the details, now was I?" James said, pretending to be hurt. The others laughed.

"Ah, what the hell," James finally cracked a smile again. "I'm sorry for Snape for being such a Slytherin that he is, and I'm sorry that he won't leave us alone. And I'm definitely more than sorry for having let him hex me before that Quidditch game, and if you don't stop looking at me as if I had blonde hair or something, you'll be sorry, too!" he ended with a threat, and the other three turned their heads away.

After a minute or so of silence Peter shifted in his crouching position. "My turn now, is it?"

"Yeah."

"I was just following him — you," he pointed at Sirius, "through the village of Hogsmeade, when at the corner of the apothecary a cat jumped out from nowhere. It was really weird, though; it could just as well have been the devil itself. It didn't act as a normal cat would; instead it wrinkled its nose and let his whiskers twitch and wagged its tail. I didn't know what to do; all right, I already knew where Sirius was going — it wasn't too difficult to understand once I saw him jumping over the hedge — so I just humped my back to mirror the cat, wrinkled my own nose, twitched my own whiskers, and wagged my own tail. The cat for some strange reason found this amusing, and started to hop towards me sideways. I bared my teeth and growled. It stared at me and let out a questioning mew. When I didn't budge it started to get uncomfortable, turned around, and ran away towards the Forbidden Forest. I myself walked casually back to the castle.

"It seemed familiar though, the cat," Peter added thoughtfully in conclusion.

"Maybe we've seen it around in the Forest then," James suggested.

"Maybe," Peter nodded.

"But tell me," Remus interjected, "how is it possible then that you swore to me you saw Sirius entering the cave?"

Peter blushed slightly. "Ah, well, I did see him. Later. When I came back here to keep watch. Then I saw him coming out for a moment, and then going back in."

"And why were you panting then when you came back to the castle, if you had just walked slowly?" James dared to ask.

Peter thought quickly. "Out of habit," he replied with a sly smile, and then sighed. "Alright. I'm sorry I let a strangely acting cat frighten me away from making sure Sirius wouldn't flee too far. And I'm sorry my internal me is so small that I'm no use. And I'm sorry for being too slow on the uptake and therefore not pounding some sense into Snape before it was too late. And I'm sorry for all the other things I should be sorry for but don't remember at the moment."

Remus smiled.

"Don't be sorry for fleeing from the cat," he said. "I have a feeling you did the right thing."

"Why do you say that?" Sirius wondered.

"My turn now?" Remus asked instead.

Peter nodded.

"When I woke up in the morning in the Hospital Wing, I was surprised to see I wasn't alone there. Though the curtains were drawn around my cot, I could see through a small opening Pomfrey taking a tray full of potions to someone else. My first thought, of course, was that I had somehow got wild with you and injured one of you, but then I heard Pomfrey mentioning the name."

"Who was it?" Sirius asked anxiously.

"Let me finish or I'll interrupt your story, too," Remus threatened. "Anyway, she was talking in the most soothing tones she could manage, and it appeared that the patient had a case of shock."

"Snape, then?" Sirius asked.

"Let me finish," Remus manifested. "Had it been Snape, I wouldn't have been that surprised, though, because who knows what the three of you could have done while I was out. And in addition, I had a strange feeling in the pit of my stomach, or in this very case in my nose, that I had smelled Snape sometime during the night."

"And it's hard to forget that smell too quickly, now isn't it?" Sirius snickered.

"Shut up, and let him finish," James and Peter almost shouted.

"Thanks," Remus said. "Alright, then I drew away the curtains, and I saw McGonagall sitting up on a bed—"

"McGonagall?" all three asked incredulously.

"Yes, McGonagall. And if you don't want me to finish, I won't."

"We do, we do, of course we do," the others quickly said.

"So, there she was, sitting on a bed, her hands trembling, her hair loose — and you've no idea how long exactly it actually is — and her eyes brimming with tears. And she took turns in staring at her fingernails in a horrified way, and trying to gnaw them off or just pull them out. So, Peter, are you sure you got this nasty scratch on your side from a branch in the forest?"

"So that's why the cat looked so familiar to you," James said, understanding dawning on his face.

"Yeah, it very well could have been her," Peter nodded. "It seems she doesn't even like killing mice and rats, not that I disapprove, of course."

"Wonder what she would do if we let a ferocious fly or mosquito free in her classroom?" Sirius asked.

"Probably transfigure it into a quill or something," Peter replied.

"You're right, Peter. My turn now?" Sirius turned to the others.

"Yep," Peter and James said.

"No, not yet," Remus said. "I wanted to say that actually I'm sorry for being a beast. And I'm sorry for hating Snape so much that I don't ever stop you from ridiculing him. And I'm sorry for ever doubting you. And most of all I'm sorry for not having a camera with me at the Hospital Wing so I could have taken a picture of McGonagall with her hair loose."

"We've got to remedy that last one," James said with a wicked grin.

"Yeah, what about this Tuesday?" Peter suggested.

"Sounds good to me," Sirius replied. Remus and James nodded.

"Now is it my turn finally?" Sirius asked.

"Go ahead," Remus smiled nastily.

"Well, it all started when I went to the library in the afternoon…"

"You and library?" Remus asked.

"Yeah, there's this Carol that Pince is training as her assistant in case something should happen to her in the war, and she only needs a bit more convincing for her to let me into the restricted section. But anyway, I went there at about half past five and…"

"What, only half an hour to dinner, and you went to a girl?" James asked, having got a signal from Remus.

"Yeah, you see I had this urge to find that book…"

Peter coughed silently at the word 'urge'.

"Anyway, that's not important right now," Sirius quickly said. "I go in there and what do I see!" He stretched his hands out to the ceiling of the cave to enforce his words, and stayed in this position for a while when nobody said a word. After some half a minute of staying like that he let his hands drop and continued. "Snape himself sitting at a table, a heavy tome on potions open in front of him, co-studying with," he again made a dramatic pause to let the others shout _"What? Who?"_ but the others remained quiet.

"With Lily Evans," he finally finished.

"WHAT! How can this little spawn think he has any right to even go close to an angel as beautiful as my Lily is! How can he even imagine that his pretending to want to study gives him an excuse to sit at the same table with her! How can this fool believe that that kind of behaviour could ever be considered excusable! Sucking up to my woman! I will find a really painful and horrifying death for him if he ever touches a hair on her head!"

"Erm… actually he had an arm around her shoulders…" Sirius said quietly.

"WHAAAAAAAT?!"

"James, calm down, let him finish!" Peter and Remus had used their united weight to pin him to the ground.

"Sorry," he murmured, a feisty glint still in his eyes.

"Anyway, I felt almost as betrayed as James right now," Sirius continued silently, "and then I had an idea. An idea so horrifying and painful that I could think of no other person, besides maybe Voldemort, who would deserve it. And so I plopped down on their desk, and told Lily that you had insisted Snape to be civil with her, so that he could later ask her out for you. And then when she had stormed off shouting vengeance…"

"So that's why she sent the flock of sparrows at me," James mumbled.

"Anyway, then I told Snape where to go."

Silence.

"You always tell him where to go," Remus said finally.

"Yeah, you always tell him to go to hell," Peter added.

"I do, don't I," Sirius chuckled.

James was still fuming.

"Anyway, I'm really sorry. It was a dangerous thing to do. Too stupid even by my standards," Sirius said.

"No, he deserved it," James mumbled, and even Remus and Peter were forced to nod.

"But he deserves what he's got now even more," Peter said.

"What's that?" Sirius asked.

"A Wizard's Debt. He owns James his life," Peter smiled.

Another smile was creeping back to James' features, and Sirius sighed happily. Peter and Remus were already beaming.

"So, are we going back to the castle now, or do you fancy missing the lunch, too?" Remus suddenly asked, getting up on his sore legs and taking the Invisibility cloak from where they had left it at the mouth of the cave.

"Lunch it is," Peter said, and transformed.

Sirius nodded, getting on his feet, and plopping the rat-Peter into his pocket.

James was the last to get to his feet. With a quick smile he took the invisibility cloak from Remus, ready to throw it on them all when there was a chance of being seen. Right now they were quite safe from being noticed.

---

"So, friends forever?" Peter asked, having just resumed his human form fair way away from the Whomping Willow.

"No, I don't want to be a friend to any of you," Sirius said, earning three disbelieving looks.

"You… don't want?" Peter stuttered.

"No."

"Why?" Remus was bold enough to ask.

"Friendship — it's just another form of being acquaintances. I want us to be best friends." Sirius explained, and met James' eyes that were as round as wheels, whether because Sirius had just said something that he considered really surprisingly ridiculous, or just because Sirius had finally managed to say the word _acquaintances_ without stumbling with it, he didn't know. "But best friends, they can tell each other whatever they think of them, even if it's bad; and they won't get angry because they know they are best friends regardless those faults."

"Wow, Sirius," Remus said after some silence. "That was… deep."

"So, best friends?" James asked quickly, about to open the front door of Hogwarts castle.

"Best friends," the other three confirmed.

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